DISAPPOINTING SNACK

Last week at work, I was sharing with some co-workers some of my favorite food items as a child. My grandfather always treated us to dried apricots and canned sardines. I also mentioned fresh coconuts and pomegranates.

I don't eat those items much anymore, but still enjoy them. As we were discussing this topic, I thought it would be fun to stop by the grocery store and buy two coconuts: One for home and one to share at work.

This morning I woke up early and drove to the grocery store. I wasn't sure if coconuts were seasonal or if they were available year round. As I was browsing through the produce department, a store employee asked if I needed help. I asked him if he had any fresh coconuts in stock. He said "Yes" and pointed me in their direction. I grabbed two and took them home.

Later in the afternoon, I felt compelled to have a snack and took one of the two coconuts into the garage. Using a hammer and a clean nail, I punched three holes in the coconut and let the milk drain into a cup. After emptying the milk from the coconut, I offered some to Debra and to Ashley. Ashley wasn't interested, but Debra was. So, Debra and I split the coconut milk.

Debra didn't finish hers, however, because she said she preferred it refrigerated and I had served it at room temperature, straight from the coconut. I gulped my portion and the remainder of Debra's portion then returned to the garage to crack the coconut with my hammer. I was eager to fill a bowl with chunks of fresh coconut for future snacking throughout the evening.

After sufficiently cracking the shell, I began to separate it from the meat. As I peeled away the hard shell, I discovered soft, gray, mushy coconut meat with green, moldy veins spreading through it. It was the first time I had ever opened a coconut to find that it was rotten. Absolutely, completely rotten.

And Debra and I had already finished drinking the milk!

I showed the coconut to Debra and Ashley and they were totally grossed out and I feel like I'm going to get sick.